It was exactly 1 week ago that Lucas earned his wings. This past week has been one of sadness, but we are finding strength that can only be explained by our loving Heavenly Father's hand. Yesterday Kaden was outside riding a neighbors skateboard and trying some new tricks. Then as we were getting ready for bed he said, "Mom, I thought Lucas was inside. Then I remembered he's in heaven and could see me doing all of my cool tricks!" I had to laugh. Laughter is just as theraputic and healing as crying. I find myself breaking down and tearing up over the dumbest things. Like the other day when I decided to transfer all of my stuff from the diaper bag back to a purse. I was cleaning out the pockets of the diaper bag and came across the tube of ora-gel that I had bought him back when all of this started and the doctor told me he was just teething. I kept his bear and slept with it a few nights ago. It still smells like him and I cried as I held it to my face. I am going to miss that little guy so much. We've gone as a family to visit his grave sight a couple of times this week and it's been nice. We took turns telling Lucas what we loved about him and what we are going to miss. It was a great activity for the boys to connect with him as they were distracted running around the cemetary. We are in the process of deciding what to put on his head stone. We have to decide soon because it will take 6 weeks to get made and it has to be put in before the ground freezes. We decided to purchase our plots and had Lucas burried between us. The head stone will have all three of us on it. (With the exception of our death dates of course.) I know that life will never be the same. I feel an emptiness in my heart that can never be filled. I love my son so very much. I know that we will be together again someday but in the mean time, it will not be easy as I am not a patient person. I guess that's a quality I will need to work on. I want to thank all of you for your support and please continue to pray for us as your prayers have strengthened us. We love you all!!!